Life through a glass of wine!

कुछ तो क़र्ज़ चुकाने थे ऐ ज़िंदगी, नम थी आँखें , हम रो भी ना पाए। कुछ तो क़र्ज़ चुकाने थे ऐ ज़िंदगी, हमने दुआ करी किसी अपने को मौत आए। कुछ तो क़र्ज़ चुकाने थे ऐ ज़िंदगी, लफ़्ज़ तो थे पर कुछ कह ना पाए। कुछ तो क़र्ज़ चुकाने थे ऐ ज़िंदगी, दूर हुए इतने कि कंधा ना दे पाए। कुछ तो क़र्ज़ चुकाने थे ऐ ज़िंदगी, दर्द हुआ पर महसूस ना कर पाए। कुछ तो क़र्ज़ चुकाने थे ऐ ज़िंदगी, जागे ना थे और सो भी ना पाए। कुछ तो क़र्ज़ चुकाने थे ऐ ज़िंदगी, हम चल ना सके पर ठहर भी ना पाए। कुछ तो क़र्ज़ चुकाने थे ऐ ज़िंदगी, पंख तो थे पर उड़ ना पाए। कुछ तो क़र्ज़ चुकाने थे ऐ ज़िंदगी , सब गँवा के भी उनसे कुछ हासिल ना कर पाए। कुछ तो क़र्ज़ चुकाने थे ऐ ज़िंदगी, माफ़ ना किया और भुला भी ना पाए। कुछ तो क़र्ज़ चुकाने थे ऐ ज़िंदगी, छलकी पलकें और लफ़्ज़ बह आए।

I was fourteen when my mother was diagnosed with breast cancer. It was the first time in my life I had seen my iron man father break down and cry like a baby. Thankfully, it was an early stage and the prognosis looked good. I saw my mother go through surgery and grueling sessions of chemotherapy. There was not one side effect that she did not have. She would cry with pain piercing her bones due to the death and subsequent growth of white blood cells in her bone marrow. Her hair fell off. She was unable to eat anything. All her veins collapsed. Heparin was not much help. She received a chemo-port which got infected and gave her a blood infection. She survived the ordeal but never completely recovered from it. Sometimes I wonder if the treatment for cancer took away more of her health than the cancer itself. In my best friend's mother's case, it actually did. Her mother was diagnosed with a brain tumour by accident. She had fallen and injured her head. The pain refused to go.